Mystery Men | 1999

C.A., I'm doing my best.

Your best? Quick question:

Is this your best?

I realize you're upset.

Victor, I'm positioned.

Do you understand what that means, on a very personal level here...

...to know the companies that make these products...

...want me to be their spokesperson?

Their voice?

I think we should focus on the positive.

Tonight was good.

Yeah? You think so?

'Cause I was worried it was... pathetic!

"Amazing Triumphs At A Nursing Home!" That's great copy, Vic.

I'm a publicist, not a magician.

You want big news? You must have big fights.

A superhero needs a supervillain. Thanks to you, we've got none left.

Then get the Death Man.

Death Man is dead.

Father Doom.

Life without parole.

Apocalypto's doing 50 years. Armagezzmo's in exile.

Baron Von Chaos got the chair.

Really?

Casanova is locked up in a nuthouse.

Casanova Frankenstein.

Now, there was a supervillain.

You know, he just...

He's got those eyes, you know?

I can't do it, but...

That voice. Such pure evil.

The battles we used to have. Extraordinary.

"Used to. "

That's the problem, Captain. "Used to. "